SeBloWriMo

Some of you may have heard of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month); an event where aspiring/veteran authors dedicate the month of November to writing a 50,000 word novel (175 pages!) over 30 days. By all accounts it does not often produce great fiction, but it does always generate great inspiration in the participants. The forced requirement to write every single day to keep up the pace towards that lofty goal helps get the juices flowing.

As an off-shoot of this movement there is also NaBloWriMo; the equivalent for blogs in which the goal is to write a blog post every day of the month October.

I am planning to do my own version of these... Sex Blog Writing Month. During the entire month of November I plan to write a blog post every single day of at least 30 lines (as formatted in our theme). That comes to about 10,000 words of blog posting in total (possibly more).

Partially this is because it sounds like a fun challenge. Partially to push me out of my comfort zone by forcing me to write when I may not otherwise be inspired. And finally, because odds are with a long holiday coming up, December and January may well be fairly lean pickings on here.

Now, I expect that not all posts are going to be about sex and/or polyamory. I imagine a fair few will not. I hope that won't be too disappointing to our regular readers, but I will try my best to be interesting no matter what I come up with for the day.

30 posts over 30 days of at least 30 lines. Anyone else game?

Arthur (it has come to my attention that the colour coding of our posts does not show up in feeds, hence the byline)

Explanations - Responded

As always, my mother got straight to the point; "So if I understand correctly you share a girlfriend? Well, if it makes you all equally happy anything is ok with me."

And with that it doesn't sound like she has any further questions. I was struck by the efficiency of her response; making sure she understood correctly, then making sure it's not some unbalanced situation, and closing with a quick affirmation that she doesn't disapprove.

I guess it's no wonder all her sons went into science.

I'm not sure this'll make Delilah any less nervous about meeting her though. ;)

Explanations - Posted

So,... I just sent off an e-mail to my mother.

It was the third draft that finally made it; on Kidder's advice (go read his new blog with his lovely wife Jade) I toned down the amount I said to give her the opportunity to decide how much she actually wants/needs to know.

Next time my parents are over it'd be difficult (and undesirable) to hide Delilah from them, so I had to do something.

... and now I wait.

More to follow soon, when I find our if I'm right about the kind of response I expect. My mum's pretty cool about most things. *fingers crossed*

Explanations

I am trying to write a tricky e-mail right now. No, it isn't my own thoughts or feelings that are making it difficult. Rather, it is trying to judge the feelings of my mother that's the sticking point.

See,... I'm trying to write her about Delilah and everything she represents.

Ordinarily I would try to wait out a convenient place in an everyday conversation to insert the information and then just wedge it in. But since my family lives overseas that's hampered by the tyranny of infrequent communication. Additionally, I don't speak too much about people that my mother doesn't know when I'm on the phone to her, so there is no graceful way to bring her up and then increase the frequency and importance until her mind is primed with curious questions.

And that just turns this into a balancing act.

On the one hand I want to give her all the information, unashamed of my choices. On the other hand I don't want to drown her in more information than she cares for either.

And least of all do I want Delilah to feel like she is a secret. She's officially been our girlfriend for near to 7 months now (and some sort of celebration would have been in order, had I paid more attention last month around the 6-month mark), and it is weighing on my mind that I cannot mention her in my conversations without coming completely out of left field.

So, here I sit. Writing. Trying to say enough without saying too much.

I think I almost have it nailed. I can't imagine my mum taking it badly, but it's hard not to worry about making your own mother uncomfortable, even when it's extremely unlikely.

e[lust] edition #30

Photo courtesy of Emmy @ Right Turn Without Signaling

Welcome to e[lust] - Your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you're looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you're going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #31? Start with the rules, check out the schedule and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Week's Top Three Posts ~

Crotch Topiary & Other Delights - I admit I started simple, I realised my teenage dream of having a Winona-inspired heart emblazoned on my mound. It was perfect. I used Contact paper to design my heart and just went to town pulling out every hair that was not covered.

In Defense of Exclusion - Sometimes it's nice to be with people who are like you. It's nice to be around people who get your kink, your fetish - to be somewhere that you don't have to explain it to.

The Boy At Summer Camp - It started with an email with the subject line 'butch at your service,' and an offer for a blow job. And I thought, hm. Well, you know, I do like those. But I'm not usually attracted to boys.

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Ask Lilly: "My sex toy stinks - what should I do?" - Would you put it in your mouth with that smell? Would you gag from the smell and taste? If yes, then why the hell put it in your vagina or ass??

~ Featured Post (Lilly's Pick) ~

A Day At The Circus

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the "read more..." tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Erotic Writing

A Long Hot Weekend
A night time walk
A Summer Honeymoon
Blithely Sauntering
Cleaning Up
Cigar
Dreamweaver
Ep 2: One Last Time
Full Frontal Nerdity
Get ready for take off...
Hear this
Let's Play a Game
Le Glamour, the best swing club experience ever
Perspective
Patience for What She Wants
The Cane
The Car Wash
what makes you happy?

Kink & Fetish

A First Ever Punishment
crunk
Having Respect for Dominants
One Year. Today
Spider silk
Those inside-out, head-exploding orgasms
To Munch Or Not To Munch?

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

assplay and me...
Comparisons
Here Comes The Bride
Lover as Chameleon - Flexible Sexual Kinkery
Must we all get along?
Not all conclusions are easy to come by
Non-Monogamy and Starbucks
The (Female) Phenomenon of Emotional Masochism
Why I Love Sex (In That 70's Show)

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Internet Drag
Selling Used Socks on eBay for Extra Money
Sex in Sin City (Yes I had me some...)
The Curses of the Scarlet Woman
Things I Looove Thursday

Wanton Wednesday - Arthur Gets Nailed

Arthur is a very blokey sort of geek. It is an unusual combination, I suppose. He goes to the gym, he loves a good adrenalin hit, but he isn't into sports. He plays games and speaks tech, but he isn't really your super-nerdy indoorsman either. He is a well-built geekified t-shirt & jeans kind of guy, and I love that about him.

That being said, I also love it when he strays outside of his box. The man is sex on legs in a well-fitting suit, and I'm even quite partial to him in budgie smugglers (that would be those very tight-fitting lycra swimming pants to all of our overseas readers) but those sorts of things call for very specific occasions. He can't really strut about the house in a suit or duck down to the shops in his swimmers. He can, however, wear some sexy black polish at any time, even to work.


It took a bit of convincing from Delilah and myself, along with a promise to take it off afterwards (I may have neglected that part of my promise for a day or so *wink*) but Arthur was a wonderful pedicure participant.

I am not really a foot person. I'm not even a person who has a particular thing for men in make-up. I am someone who loves seeing Arthur do something that little bit different with his beautiful self, and I love it even more when he lets me do it for him.

Or maybe to him. I'm not sure he's decided on that yet.

Not into feet or lovey dovey grooming? Go check out some properly wanton people by clicking on this link:

Non-Linear

I have written before about how society teaches us to treat monogamy as "the default".

There is however another aspect of life that is generally taken for granted; an expectation of a linear progression through a series of stages. In our youth we go to school, at some point we notice boys/girls. We continue our education, and we have a relationship or two. We graduate and start a career, and we find "the one". We settle down and have kids. We toil and struggle raising those kids before we finally retire.

It's the great big template of life and whilst living inside it we can barely tell there is any other way. And if your life does not proceed exactly along these stages it may feel like you're failing. Failing at life!

But why? Why must we "act our age" or "settle down"? What is the virtue unless we choose it for ourselves?

Moving from monogamy to non-monogamy puts everything in perspective. Everything is a choice.

I want to have at least one kid, but why should that require me to settle down? Neither our friends, nor our social life, nor even our non-monogamy is incompatible with having kids. Why should I act my age all the time? Sometimes it's fun to dangle upside-down off the monkey bars no matter what your age.

Recently I've been thinking about jumping back to studying. Not because I'm unhappy with my job. Far from it. There are just so many interesting things, and it would be a shame to delay until the stage where it's once again "officially allowed": retirement.

I'd like to challenge all our readers to consciously make the choice to do something non-linear in their lives.

You'll feel better for it. Trust me.